Oprah! Oprah!

Oprah Winfrey has opened a new store and I, for one, couldn't be happier.

I mean, Oprah already tells me what to watch, what to think, what to read, what to buy, what not to eat and who to vote for.

But now I can "feel stress-free in an Oprah nightgown and baby-soft socks," according to the Chicago Sun-Times, "writing in my 'Passion' journal while sipping hot tea from a mug emblazoned with one of Oprah's favorite quotes, 'Live Your Own Dreams.' "

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Hey, did you know Sidney Poitier wrote an autobiography? Oprah did!
I think Jiminy Cricket first said that.

Oprah's new 5,500-square-foot store in Chicago is cleverly called the Oprah Store, not to be confused with her TV show, "The Oprah Winfrey Show," her magazine, "O," her Web site, www.oprah.com, her production company, Harpo (that's "Oprah" spelled backward), her new cable channel, the Oprah Winfrey Network, or her satellite radio channel, Oprah & Friends.

I'm just glad Oprah has finally opened a store, even though I'm sure she's reluctant to personally profit from her celebrity.

For example, you can buy a $24 polo shirt for your dog, sold exclusively at the new Oprah Store!

Book your ticket to Chicago now, preferably on a giant, Oprah-shaped 747.

This is a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity.

Or should that be Oprah-tunity?

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